The beauty of flowers is universal. Grumps and idiots may say, “BUT, beauty is subjective!” Give me a break! Oh sure some flowers are more appealing than others, and what’s the deal with ROSES anyway? Huh? Sure rose are really very very nice, but I can name about half a dozen flowers that I find more appealing. Personally, I lean toward the notion that the appeal of roses is a marketing gimmick from the flower industry. It’s a conspiracy, ya know? shhhh….. *wink nod*
I’ve never met an ugly flower. I prefer some to others for their aroma and visual appeal, but that IS subjective. Right? Right. I won’t give you a list of those I find more appealing than others. Well, maybe you can bribe me, but you’ll have to go first.
How do YOU like to experience flowers? Cut and arranged, or growing and in a natural setting? Gardens can pass for “natural settings,” if you prefer. I won’t be picky. (Pun not intended, but cute) I enjoy flowers MUCH better in the open air and growing. Flowers in a vase or a basket are pretty, but they make me sad. I know that they are dead already. You’re just looking at a pretty corpse. Soon they will die and droop and if you wait long enough they will turn brown and fall from the stem and then you have to unceremoniously toss them in the dumpster. If you are around when I kick the bucket, PLEASE don’t do that to me!
And don’t get all Macho on me, OK? Homophobic slobs! If you’re going to be like that and have even convinced yourself that it is true, then God, Jeb, I don’t even want to know you! I LOVE flowers and always have, but I have never in my life received flowers–57 years. Know why?
Because I have a PENIS!
That’s why. I have even made a point of letting people close to me know how much I would love and appreciate posies from time to time. But nope, not so much as a single Dandelion . . . Oh well. If I were to have a standard American funeral (Which I won’t), then THAT is when I would get the flowers in great big bunches, and all
Well this article didn’t exactly go where I intended. I must have taken a wrong turn somewhere around Albuquerque. I have been going on for nearly 500 words about subjective and objective beauty, homophobia and a personal little rant about how I want to be given flowers and no one will give them to me . . .
This REALLY isn’t what I intended, but it will have to serve as the first installment. The objective beauty of flowers was supposed to be the foundational analogy for where I was going. And I will get there. Hang tight. I’ll even provide cross links when all is done.
In the MEANTIME,
Thanks for letting me share.
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